The Little Books
The world would be a better place with better people. I'd like you all to consider something--consider what it is to be a bimbo. Consider what kind of man you have always wanted. Be with him now. Take him to your breasts. Does he look like me? Now let him suck on those mommy-milkers.
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A himbo is a man we all have inside of us. He bigger than us, he's taller than us and he's dumber than us. The ladies love him and he knows how to treat one at a time. He is a god.
There isn't anything wrong with being a himbo in this world. Just because women love you and you don't understand everything they say doesn't mean that your biceps won't take you further than any brains ever will. Sit down with me. Have a glass of wine. Have a beer. Now go pick up some vodka. . . You've been played. There isn't a man or woman that doesn't wish that they were more beautiful. . . If you feel beautiful, you are beautiful. Now, does a beautiful man deserve a name too?
You will find her. You will find him. You will find the one, the one that completes you.
[Himbo & Bimbo def'n: A man or woman who appreciates plastic surgery*]
[Do not mention plastic-surgery at all in the book.*]
[Refer to himbos as a type of "manimal" at least once.]
[Should readers be kept in the mind that they are the himbos and bimbos already, or bring them out and back in?]
[I need to put this book out when the term, "Himbo," is at a critical mass to bring straight husbands in to its use.]
Allude or otherwise step closely around, "be careful that you do not get too much plastic surgery." up to fifteen times.
Approx. "Stay off the pills.". . . "I know some of your addictions started the day you had surgery. You didn't like the job. . ." [Downhill spiral because it didn't fix the self-esteem issues.]
["Sometimes the things we hate hate us too. It was too big. Now it's too sharp. There's no escaping it. You can't breathe looking in the mirror. . ."]
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[Phone conversation: "So, do you feel that you have any misogynistic slant in this?" "No, it's fair and square because now I get to call you a bimbo."]
[WOMEN RECLAIMING THE TERM, "BIMBO." . . . "And a man's leading the charge?" "Absolutely--I love my wife."]
[Ellen would have me on for the second time to explain that Himbos are beautiful, dumb and monogamous manimals. . . "No, that's not what we're talking about, Ellen." "No, no, we're not talking about that." "Why don't we change the subject. . ." randomly ad infinitum. . . slowly turning into Dory. Beginning with "Will you quit it, I'm trying to talk here!" . . . "You wanna piece of me?". . ."What, the room isn't big enough for you?". . . "I saw another himbo not too long ago! That way! It went that way!" . . . "Oh, I'm so sorry, I suffer from short term memory loss.". . ."So, Dory. . . I mean, Zachary. . ."]
[Find reasons to make comments on other subjects: "Consumer spending is always good for our country. There'll be lots of credit card debt."]
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"Himbos are the heroes that we have been waiting for." - my wife
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principles of himbos:
- I have the self love to give to you to throw it down in bed
principles of bimbos:
- I only own dildos that are 1” or more shorter than my partners size
- a lavender colored vibrator rocks my world
- even if my fiance is forced BY THE FBI to throw priceless gestures and magnificently thoughtful gifts away so that even the best he can do from hell is unappreciable, he will buy them again for me and our future family.